Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Sex and the Online Dating Profile

When it comes to creating an alluring and sexy online dating profile, balance is always the key. You want to be able show off your best qualities in an honest and approachable way, but it can be a lot of fun providing some sizzle to spark the imagination. Straddling the line between subtle playfulness and over-the-top vulgarity can be tricky of course, but if done right, you are guaranteed to be the life of the online dating party.

Here then are some tips on navigating the potentially stormy waters of sex in online dating.

The removal of inhibition

One of the exciting aspects of online dating is the removal of shyness and inhibition. Singles often feel free to say things they would never utter in person. This can be extremely liberating for many people who struggle in social settings, however, it may also lead to problems (specifically if you portray yourself in a way that can't be lived up to in the flesh). Being aware of this fact should help you when interacting with other members, and it will help create a balanced photo profile; one that is at turns sexy, subtle and classy.

The subtle approach

Online dating is an adult realm. Sex and sexuality are a big part of the equation, and everyone knows that. Still, adopting a subtler approach when creating your photo personal may be the best bet. Remember, the more you leave to the imagination, the more intrigued other singles will be. There's no limit to how suggestive your choice of language can get, but remember that once you cross over into what some may consider vulgarities, you may create an impression that is hard to shake.

The enticing photo stash

You may be proud of your breasts or shapely rear, but do you really want to put it all over your profile? After you've established contact and got to know other singles, you can always share these types of photographs. Initially though, it may repel more people than it attracts. In fact, having a stash of enticing, non-G rated photographs to share later on can be a fun and exciting way to steam up a promising relationship. Just remember to pick your spots (and partners) with care.

The sexy nickname (not always a good idea)

Obviously the best nicknames are those that are fun, easy to say and catchy. There are never any rules in online dating, so you're free to choose what you like, but remember, the name you select will most often become the moniker other members know you by. So be careful when using sexual innuendo (regardless of if its subtle or more risqué), as a name like "BettyBigBoobs" may end up causing more embarrassment and discomfort than anything else.

Creating unrealistic expectations

By choosing to post suggestive photos and overtly sexual language, you may be opening yourself up to those who do not have the best intentions in mind. Ultimately, you have the choice over who you correspond with, but never feel the need to go along with certain behaviour if it makes you feel uncomfortable. Clearly telling other singles what you're looking for and what you hope to get from your online dating experience is the best way to avoid unrealistic expectations and misunderstandings.

The idea of balance in a relationship

While some relationships founded on pure physical attraction can flourish, the majority do not. Remember that while sex is exciting and fun, it takes much more to foster a real, strong relationship. If finding your true love is your ambition, remember that a focus on sex can only get you so far. In the end, you'll find that you need more than that to find the match you've been looking for.

Online dating will always be what you make it. It can be a potentially freeing way to meet like-minded singles from all over the world, but you have to remain true to yourself. Sex and sexuality are a big part of the equation, but you should never feel pressured into acting any way that does not make you completely comfortable. Ultimately, being honest and upfront about what you want is an important step in avoiding misunderstandings and having fun. Good luck!

Mitch Conway is the author of The Go-Getter's Guide To Finding Your Soulmate, the first dating guide designed to help singles save time and become more proactive at meeting people. Mr. Conway describes himself as having been an "average single guy" who decided to take a pragmatic and structured approach to finding his soulmate. His techniques and advice were put together over a period of three years into what is now The Go-Getter's Guide to Finding Your Soulmate.

To find out more, visit http://www.gogettersguides.com

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